If you are annoyed by unwanted sales people and solicitors knocking at your door, one of these signs may help. From polite requests to full-on zombie threats, there is something for everyone.
For more, also see 18 Funny, Beautiful, and Sarcastic Garden Signs.
Do Unwanted Solicitors Drive You Nuts?
Here’s the thing. It’s your home and your terms.
- Do you need to prevent the ringing doorbell from waking up the baby or sending the dogs into a tailspin?
- Do you hate dealing with random sales people but will make an exception for your favourite cookies?
- Would you rather never open the door to a stranger to discuss religion?
- Is your family more than you can handle but your friends are always welcome?
Peace in the home could be one sign away. Here’s some I found on Etsy. You can also scroll down to see them below. And, if your situation is really unique, you can always have a custom sign made or create your own. These may not stop every unwanted caller, but they should do a good job with discouraging most of them. The rest can be eaten by zombies.
12 Ways to Say No Before They Ring Your Bell
I will leave it to you to decide how plain, straight-forward, silly, or sarcastic you wish to be.
If you want to see all of the signs I chose in Etsy, you can see them here.
1 Friends Welcome * Relatives by Appointment
2 Beware the Barking Dog!…
3 No Soliciting * Solicitors will be eaten by zombies
4 Unless you sell cookies, No Soliciting * seriously
5 No Soliciting
Because we are running out of places to hide the bodies.
6 No Soliciting
We are too broke to buy anything…
We know who we are voting for…
7 Shhh… Night Shift Nurse is Sleeping…
8 Doorbells wake children and make babies cry…
9 No Soliciting Unless You’re a Kid
10 No Solicitors
11 Please, No Soliciting unless you are dropping off a bottle of wine…
12 Shhhhhh… Sleeping Babies and Barking Dogs…
And, if you prefer to put the message under foot, you could get it on a custom welcome (or not so-welcome) mat: Custom Welcome Mat. Pick the message you want.
I’d show you some more, but I have to go. There’s someone knocking on my door.
~Melissa the Empress of Dirt ♛
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Linda says
Problem is, no one understands the term “solicitors” or “soliciting”. My sign says, ” No agents, pedlars or solicitors”. Just had a gal at the door saying, “Don’t worry, I’m not selling anything” … but she was soliciting donations. And the friendly religious people (agents of religion perhaps?) say the same. I don’t know what sign would work, cause I have no barking dog and think a firm “no soliciting” should work. Perhaps “If you don’t know the meaning of “no soliciting” buy a dictionary)
J K Weigle says
Classic EOD!
Ruth Smith says
Hi, Empress of Dirt. I love your sense of humour, it makes my day start right.
Thanks.
Ruth
rosemary says
I’m sorry … I can’t stop laughing long enough to say anything intelligent.
You slay me Melissa !
Melissa J. Will says
Haha, thanks, Rosemary! 🙂