If you are annoyed by unwanted sales people and solicitors knocking at your door, one of these signs may help. From polite requests to full-on zombie threats, there is something for everyone.
For more, also see 18 Funny, Beautiful, and Sarcastic Garden Signs.
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Do Unwanted Solicitors Drive You Nuts?
Here’s the thing. It’s your home and your terms.
- Do you need to prevent the ringing doorbell from waking up the baby or sending the dogs into a tailspin?
- Do you hate dealing with random sales people but will make an exception for your favourite cookies?
- Would you rather never open the door to a stranger to discuss religion?
- Is your family more than you can handle but your friends are always welcome?
Peace in the home could be one sign away. Here’s some I found on Etsy. You can also scroll down to see them below. And, if your situation is really unique, you can always have a custom sign made or create your own. These may not stop every unwanted caller, but they should do a good job with discouraging most of them. The rest can be eaten by zombies.
12 Ways to Say No Before They Ring Your Bell
I will leave it to you to decide how plain, straight-forward, silly, or sarcastic you wish to be.
If you want to see all of the signs I chose in Etsy, you can see them here.
1 Friends Welcome * Relatives by Appointment
2 Beware the Barking Dog!…
3 No Soliciting * Solicitors will be eaten by zombies
4 Unless you sell cookies, No Soliciting * seriously
5 No Soliciting
Because we are running out of places to hide the bodies.
6 No Soliciting
We are too broke to buy anything…
We know who we are voting for…
7 Shhh… Night Shift Nurse is Sleeping…
8 Doorbells wake children and make babies cry…
9 No Soliciting Unless You’re a Kid
10 No Solicitors
11 Please, No Soliciting unless you are dropping off a bottle of wine…
12 Shhhhhh… Sleeping Babies and Barking Dogs…
And, if you prefer to put the message under foot, you could get it on a custom welcome (or not so-welcome) mat: Custom Welcome Mat. Pick the message you want.
I’d show you some more, but I have to go. There’s someone knocking on my door.
~Melissa the Empress of Dirt ♛
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Linda says
Problem is, no one understands the term “solicitors” or “soliciting”. My sign says, ” No agents, pedlars or solicitors”. Just had a gal at the door saying, “Don’t worry, I’m not selling anything” … but she was soliciting donations. And the friendly religious people (agents of religion perhaps?) say the same. I don’t know what sign would work, cause I have no barking dog and think a firm “no soliciting” should work. Perhaps “If you don’t know the meaning of “no soliciting” buy a dictionary)
J K Weigle says
Classic EOD!
Ruth Smith says
Hi, Empress of Dirt. I love your sense of humour, it makes my day start right.
Thanks.
Ruth
rosemary says
I’m sorry … I can’t stop laughing long enough to say anything intelligent.
You slay me Melissa !
Melissa J. Will says
Haha, thanks, Rosemary! 🙂